The Groupon Guide to: Forgotten Video Games
As more and more video games are rebooted, sequeled, and adapted into hit procedural dramas and breakfast pastries, some 8-bit classics have fallen by the wayside. What are some classic video games you forgot to remember?
• Battle Brothers (ActivoVision, 1989): In this high-octane punch ‘em up, two rad brothers (Clint and Vortex) must survive a concrete gauntlet in order to rescue the president’s stolen bike. Forgotten Fact: In Battle Brothers, both players could accidentally cause damage to each other, resulting in exciting real-life fistfights between real-life brothers.
• Swords & Squares (Dønderhuff ElectroPublishing, 1981): This brain-enhancing game of medieval strategy pits dueling royal courts against each other, and bestows players with a dot-matrix certificate at the end that assigns performance-based ranks, ranging from Knight of the Round to Horsepox Survivor. Forgotten Fact: Game is essentially chess.
• Olympics® ‘87! (Pixellius, 1986): You play as Torcho®, the Olympic Torch®, as he is passed hand-to-hand between different athletes on his globetrotting journey. Don’t tip over and set their sweat-slicked hair ablaze! Forgotten Fact: Not affiliated with the Olympics in any way, Olympics® ‘87 holds the record for video game most frequently mentioned in court transcripts.
Originally ran on Groupon.com, 1.25.12
Here is a joke I wrote, smelted into an actual bronze plaque, hanging in the headquarters of Groupon. This is not my entire job, just the only part that involves molten metals.
(Source: thisistheglamorous)
As I often do, I have a humor piece running on the bottom of the Featured Deal on Groupon.com today. Click above to see it in it’s beautiful context:
The Groupon Guide to: Telecommuting
With the rising popularity of mobile computing devices, home phones, and electricskywriting, there are more reasons than ever not to go to work. Maintain your productivity with these sure-fire tips to telecommuting:
Set Up a Home Office: The easiest way to ensure that you have everything you need to work from home is to systematically steal those things from your workplace one at a time. Don’t forget to smuggle home a water cooler—you’ll need water to live—as well as a few coworkers to station near it for casual banter and dancing-show recaps.
Get an Internet Connection: Also known as Radio Mail, these invisible signals will allow the boss to see you through your computer and make sure you’re working.
Turn Off the TV: If you’re really serious about getting anything done today, you’re going to have to turn the television off. Now turn it back on again—did that get your retro video-game system working? No? Maybe try blowing in it—don’t give up!
Stay Accessible: The only certain way to be productive at home is to check in at the office once every hour, just to make sure everything is going smoothly without you.
