#More #Work
#Work.
#More #Work
#Work.
The Groupon Guide to: Forgotten Video Games
As more and more video games are rebooted, sequeled, and adapted into hit procedural dramas and breakfast pastries, some 8-bit classics have fallen by the wayside. What are some classic video games you forgot to remember?
• Battle Brothers (ActivoVision, 1989): In this high-octane punch ‘em up, two rad brothers (Clint and Vortex) must survive a concrete gauntlet in order to rescue the president’s stolen bike. Forgotten Fact: In Battle Brothers, both players could accidentally cause damage to each other, resulting in exciting real-life fistfights between real-life brothers.
• Swords & Squares (Dønderhuff ElectroPublishing, 1981): This brain-enhancing game of medieval strategy pits dueling royal courts against each other, and bestows players with a dot-matrix certificate at the end that assigns performance-based ranks, ranging from Knight of the Round to Horsepox Survivor. Forgotten Fact: Game is essentially chess.
• Olympics® ‘87! (Pixellius, 1986): You play as Torcho®, the Olympic Torch®, as he is passed hand-to-hand between different athletes on his globetrotting journey. Don’t tip over and set their sweat-slicked hair ablaze! Forgotten Fact: Not affiliated with the Olympics in any way, Olympics® ‘87 holds the record for video game most frequently mentioned in court transcripts.
Originally ran on Groupon.com, 1.25.12
What am I even—
I don’t want this weekend to end.
The video I promised is currently being evaluated by the legal department of a company that has a legal department.
This is the scale I’m working on. It’s new and scary, but I want you by my side.
Video soon / stay tuned.
New video tomorrow.
Another possible all-nighter. Working on something for tomorrow. Stay tuned.
- We might be moving to a new location in the office building.
- Be on the look out for the error showing up on certain accounts on the website.
- “Did you see that picture that guy sent in of his cock and balls? How do you confuse us with a dating website? The dude had taint for miles.”
Memo from another department. Anyone who doesn’t work for [A COMPANY] should try it for a year. You can see the Dentist as many times as you want!
A personal favorite from the archives. We’re digging through them lately.
I apologize for drawing pictures on your television. It was an emergency.
